—Happy birthday to Mischa Barton, who turns 22 today. Assassination of a High School President, her upcoming flick with Bruce Willis, premiered yesterday at Sundance to a lukewarm reception. (Clips here.) In it, Barton plays a sexy schoolgirl (new territory!) in cahoots with the school nerd to find stolen SAT tests. Your move, Rachel Bilson.
—John Mayer is done blogging. I’d take his link off my favorites, but for some reason it was never there…
—Spoiler alert: web detectives have posted an exclusive video of the Top 24 American Idol contestants along with a full list of their names. This really ruins things for those of us who wanted to keep watching this season’s boring audition episodes.
—In other American Idol news, seventh season hottie Kristy Lee Cook was rumored to have racy photos and a sex tape posted online. Turns out it’s an elaborate hoax that sends you here, a website devoted to real-world issues like global warming. Don’t you hate it when you go looking for beaver and end up with crap about the environment?
—Check out this Today Show interview with Delilah Decresenzo, the real-life inspiration behind the Plain White T’s “Hey There Delilah.” The song is nominated for a Grammy, so Delilah will attend the event with lead singer Tom Higginson. There’s only one problem with this fairy-tale romance: she’s got a boyfriend of seven years.
—The Spice Girls will make a total of 50 million pounds for 17 upcoming performances in London. Split evenly among five girls, that’s…way too complicated for any of them to figure out.
—In continuing evidence that women should never call professional sports, Dana Jacobson has been suspended for a week by ESPN. Reportedly drunk during a Jan. 11 roast event, Jacobson said “fuck Notre Dame…fuck Touchdown Jesus…and fuck Jesus.” Also suspended within the last month: the chick who suggested that young golfers should “lynch [Tiger Woods] in a back alley.”
—Two months ago, Jack Nicholson lashed out when he was overlooked for the part of The Joker in 2008’s The Dark Knight — a role he made famous in 1989’s Batman. (Wasn’t there at least a part for The Joker’s great, great grandfather?) So upon hearing about Heath Ledger’s tragic death, Nicholson made a rather callous comment to the press: “That’s awful…I warned him.” Nicholson has refused to elaborate on his remark.
—Amy Winehouse is back in rehab. No, no, no!
—And Scarlett Johannson will release an album on 5/20. No, no, no!